Found: Old Puppy Pictures

Dear Winchester,

I love you, but I wish you were still small and cub-like rather than large, gangly and clumsy.

Missing good old cuddly times.

Awwww puppies.

A List For The Ages

What a beautiful morning!

Here I am in Fayetteville. Alex has just gone off to work her day shift at Jose's, a Mexican restaurant in Springdale. We stayed up late last night talking after an evening of movie watchin' and exchanging gifts. By the way she is an amazing gift giver. If anyone ever needed help picking a random gift for me I'd say (to quote Grace Slick) "Go ask Alice!" Well... you ought to call her Alex, but Josh always thought I was saying her name was Alice before they met.

Anyhow, I'm so happy to be here with her.

My thoughts waking up today went from the crazy, late-night Goldfish and Oreo-consumption-induced dream that I had to my neatly packed suitcase on the floor by the bed.

What would I do if it were not for the lists I make?

List-making seems to be handed down to me genetically, most people in my family do it. My father does it obsessively. He has a list for everything, all kept on index cards and post-its on his bathroom mirror.

Personally, lists are how I get my brain organized. I make lists for everything, including:

• Packing for trips, long or short
• Homework assignments
• Possible outfits I should try on/wear
• Outfits to wear day to day
• Things I want to write about
• Books I want to read
• Projects I need to do or finish

And on and on... lists are basically the only type of records that I keep, because I've always been opposed to journaling. I tried journaling a lot when I was younger, and looking back on those entires I found the whole "Dear Diary..." thing a bit insipid and forced. The content itself was dry and it was obvious that I focused on the small, unimportant details of life rather than the big picture. I wrote more about how I felt about other people than what my own thoughts and ideas were. So for me, lists are a vital part of my life. I doubt that I'll ever kick the habit.

♥ What kind of records do you keep - whether day to day or things that you'll keep forever?

I think photo journaling sounds like fun. I am just not very proficient with cameras.

And here is some inspiration for your list skeptics:

Secret Society of List Addicts

TeuxDeux

Listography

TTFN!

we're living in a den of thieves..

It seems that no amount of audible, repetitious reasoning can make me feel less nervous about my first semester's finals at Drury.

Although I am very fortunate that I only have to take three, they are of course in my three hardest classes and I have two in one day.

But this is not so much to worry about..

The main issue is campus life. I'm so thankful to have met a few sweet girls and the time I have spent with them is precious and I hope that it continues, however.. exposure to yet more of the disappointment that is the human race has begun to bring me down. Okay, that may be a bit harsh. Still...

I'm so ready for the holidays, which are all happiness and light (hopefully, barring any over-zealous family discussions) and I am in serious need of the peace they will provide, badly and urgently.

As a kid and a teenager, I was a total under achiever; a belief that God has a will for my life has changed that a lot. I want to be and do everything that I can, but I am only one little person. A girl who is still growing up and finding who she is, exploring the world, and will likely be in that same state for a long remainder of time. For this reason I really hope to do well this semester, so that I will gain confidence - something I strode into university with at first, but has slowly diminished over the past few months. Part of maturity is realizing what you don't know, which turns out to be.. well, almost everything.

I pray for God to be my hope, be my encouragement, and my shelter. Provide me with the strength to persevere through stressful times. Help me not to let other people steal away my identity. Your love and grace flood over me.

and it's contagious...

p.s., I miss you brother.

Happy 1st Birthday to Anabelle!

Josh's sweet little niece turns one year old today, happy birthday!

Words to Create By:

When you are describing,
A shape, or sound, or tint;
Don't state the matter plainly,
But put it in a hint;
And learn to look at all things,
With a sort of mental squint.
~Lewis Carroll

put the lights on the tree

Mom and I are trying to get busy decorating for Christmas, watching Elf and drinking hot chocolate, although it is almost 70 degrees outside! I'm getting to excited for Christmas and just bought the ultimate gift for Josh today as well.

Merry holiday time!!

♥ this video.

Things That I Keep Meaning to Tell You..

I can't believe I never posted more than two things to this blog.

I'm going to act like I do this all the time, is that all right? Of course it is...

15 minutes until Thanksgiving, and I'm running a list of my head of things to say I am thankful for at the table. But since I'll probably save myself from rambling on and forcing everyone to wait yet longer for their feast, I had better just list them all here to save their ears.

I am daily thankful for the chance to have the education that I want. My first semester at Drury has been a challenge, but I have made progress, met some great people (Sara, you are a dream!) and I'm going to Japan for a study abroad program in the spring. It's hard to believe that I am in college, that all of my parents' children are now grown and that someday soon even I shall be out of the house.

I'm thankful for my family, most of all. That remains one of the more popular statements to make, but that is something to be thankful for in itself - that there is love, and that it exists in our lives. Lately I have been thinking a lot about the dynamics of family, what constitutes a family, and why they are important. How wonderful and sometimes painful it can be to have your life wrapped up inside the lives of other human beings. I thank God that I am not isolated, that I have family and friends to love and be loved by, that they support me and that I can support them. What a blessing to see God's love come out in relationship with other people, and his plan for us all.

I sound like Tiny Tim.

Oh! I am so thankful for the holiday season! My schedule for the rest of this month into the end of January is already full and I am excited for the opportunity to see, well, everyone! California family, Andrew, Grandparents (especially the Texas ones..), Melissa who is in Mexico right now, and Alex! Finals week gives me stress but I know I'll make it through, and what amazing things I have to look forward to!

I'm also thankful for material things that I can see, taste, touch, smell, and ... read! Everything from nature to fashion to crafts and books has been inspiring me lately, and I can't wait to get some free time to complete a few projects:

1. My night table that is currently half-painted, and I would have completed by now but the wind has been picking up in the Ozarks these past few days, and I haven't had a chance to paint without all of it blowing into my face.

2. Letters for Africa team members - mainly Josh, my main squeeze- my goal is a large number and I'm hoping my creativity will carry me through! Traditional letters are great but there are only so many things to say pertaining to one trip.

3. Christmas presents, both creating them and shopping for them. I always want to get this done early but a few special things have been difficult to get to thus far. I shouldn't pressure myself so much, after all it's only Thanksgiving.

4. Random sewing/drawing projects that are too diverse to name, including some much necessary moc-making.

Whew! I need to make shorter posts... like say, one photo and one thought? Yeah, maybe tomorrow.

Second Post, Already?

Alas I must post this to make way for another one.

Because there are just way more than 21 things to be thankful for in this life.

21 Things to be Thankful for - February 2009

1. Weird, interesting music played late on Friday nights on NPR

2. Going birthday party in an old sweater whilst listening to Rocky Votolato’s Makers album

3. Laughing so much my tummy aches

4. The way listening to Fischerspooner makes me feel like I’m in a modern version of Tron

5. Special diet cheesecake with berries

6. The support of those closest to me

7. Scribbles in Moleskines

8. Cleaning out my closet

9. Singing “Pencils in the Wind” with Meli

10. Hummus, Baba Ganoush, and the best pita bread I’ve ever tasted

11. Indian music, old and new

12. Hearing Bill McGlaughlin delight in his love of classical music - with the wonderful accent of my homeland

13. Early Valentine’s flowers from my dad

14. New cereal bowls bought especially for the purpose of consuming Life cereal

15. What seems to be the re-popularization of tie-dye (not the nasty, Joe’s Crab Shack tee shirt kind though.)

16. My warm cosy bed I enjoy hiding tucked away inside

17. Squirreling away moneys for my California trip

18. Magazines of modern fiction

19. Having more ideas swirling around my brain than I can deal with or put on paper - and the energy to put some of them into motion

20. Joshua Daniel Copeland

21. Writing up lists.

Time Increasing Time

Not knowing where to go with this very first post, I suppose I will just say everything that I know.

First off, I do not know why I started this.

Secondly, I will use it anyhow.

This semester has been a total reverse from the last:

Last year I worried constantly, rushed around, felt inadequate at all of my responsibilities, fought with those I loved, and lost who I was.

The only thing that kept my imagination alive was anecdotes from school and work.

I was fueled by ramen.

I lost track of my relationship with God.

I felt ill a lot of the time.

Thankfully I was given a new beginning - I was fired from my job.

It had been a long while that I was feeling out of place, not only inadequate but unhappy. I saw it coming. I considered ending it myself, but did not want to give up or disappoint anyone.  Everyone I had originally enjoyed working with left and I realized the job itself was just not enough. Customer service is not my forte.Nor was it what I had expected my happy little job to be. I remember the relief I felt, calling my mom and telling her "It is over, can we meet for lunch?". 

I kept feeling like I should be disappointed, but I was not. 

I was tremendously happy and free.

And since then things have been a lot better. I am not one of those people who thinks that working is "not for me," because that is foolish. The truth is that I want to be happy doing whatever I do, even if it is something somewhat meaningless. 

I kind of miss straightening bottles and cashiering at Wholesale. Cashiering is fun for me.

But I do not miss staring at a computer all day, clicking in and out, or folding the same t-shirt twenty times.

It feels good to have written that. I had to, really, because I have been thinking about losing the job several times a day. 

My present circumstances will be posted at a later date.